1001 ways to kill Peter Pettigrew
by PyroPotter
Summary: The Golden Trio find a mysterious spellbook and decide to take revenge. Rated T for Violence. Very AU.


Harry Potter was walking aimlessly on Hogwarts grounds. He had nothing to do, and was extremely bored. So eventually he arrived at the library, though how he had no idea. He was wondering about something when -yep- that was Hermione sitting in the corner, reading a book.

Harry looked at the book. It was a most unusual book, the kind you expect to fall apart any second. This particular book looked as if _staring_ at it the wrong way could make it fall apart. It looked like it had been mended repeatedly. All that he could see of the title was " –ells of t-e lig-te-t an- dar-es- Mag-c". He quickly solved the puzzle of the title.

"Spells of the lightest and darkest Magic" he muttered softly to himself. Nonetheless, Hermione heard him and, looking quite startled, looked up from the book.

"Oh, Harry. It's you." She said in a rather relieved voice. "I thought you might have been Malfoy. He and his cronies have been following me all day for some reason."

"I wonder what Malfoy wants," Said Harry.

"Yeah…" Hermione said in a voice which made Harry suspicious. "So, anyways, I was looking in this book and I found some of the weirdest spells. A lot of them require extreme dark magic, but some of them don't. For example," She said pointing at a spell on page 471, "This spell is for bringing back the dead. Supposedly," She added with a sigh.

"Why 'supposedly'?" Harry asked.

"Harry, we already went over this! No magic can raise the dead!" She retorted.

"Okay, but let's try it out anyway," Harry said.

"Who will we test it on?" Hermione asked.

"Dumbledore" Harry replied with a smirk. "But first, let's go get Ron."

After maybe 5 minutes of running, they made it to the Gryffindor common room and found Ron sitting next to the fire.

"What's up?" He asked without even turning.

"Well, Hermione reckons she found a spell that can raise the dead, and we're going to test it on Dumbledore. Wanna come with?" He finally asked.

"Of course!" Ron said while getting up from his chair. After another 5 minutes of running and 5 less points for Gryffindor (Headmistress McGonagall caught them running in the halls) they finally made it to Dumbledore's tomb.

"Bloody hell." Ron said silently as he looked at the vine-covered coffin. "When d'you reckon was the last time someone came her?"

Hermione, ignoring his question, muttered "Disgraceful. Utterly disgraceful" as she looked at the coffin and realized no one had bothered to fix it since Voldemort had cracked open to retrieve the Elder Wand.

"_Mortuusanima Vivit_!" She shouted while waving her wand over Dumbledore's dead body. To her immediately noticeable surprise, Dumbledore's wounds healed and he sat up, as if he was sleeping the entire time.

_Harry's thoughts_

It actually worked!

_Ron's thoughts_

Oi! It works!

Hermione did not have any special thoughts as she promptly fainted.

"Dare I say," Dumbledore said "That any of you know why I woke up in a coffin?"

O~O~O~O~O

Harry and Ron quickly filled Dumbledore up on what had happened while they attempted to wake Hermione up. After a while, Hermione woke up, and they headed back to the Gryffindor common room.

They mostly stayed in silence until Harry suggested an idea for what to do with the spell. "Well, I would love to have Fred, Hedwig, Dobby, Sirius, Lupin, Tonks, and my parents back, but I also have another idea.". "What is it?" Ron and Hermione asked simultaneously. "Well, maybe we could use it to get revenge on Peter Pettigrew." Harry replied.

So, the Golden Trio now knowing what they would do went to the place where Peter Pettigrew was buried. Hermione used the spell to bring him back to life. "Now what?" She whispered to Ron and Harry.

"Well, we can't do it magically, or we'll be sent to Azkaban".

"So now what?" Ron asked, getting impatient.

"This," Harry said simply. Then he proceeded to punch Pettigrew so hard he fell on the hard dirt.

Ron and Hermione, seeing what Harry meant, helped Harry beat up Pettigrew. After about 5 minutes, a combination of blood loss and a hard punch to the head from Hermione, Pettigrew died and it was over. Pettigrew lay a bloody mess, and Harry, Ron, and Hermione were covered in blood and in Hermione's case, a bit of brains.

"Ughh…" Hermione said. She apparated them near enough to Hogwarts that they snuck into its protective bubble.

"_Tergeo,_" She said, pointing her wand at each of them in turn: First Ron, Then Harry, Then finally herself. Harry pulled out a large brown bag.

"What's in there?" Ron asked.

"Oh, you know, Pettigrew's remains." Harry said casually.

"_WHAT!" _Ron and Hermione almost scream.

"Well, I don't know about you guys, but for me, one violent death is not enough to pay back all the deaths he caused." Ron and Hermione agreed.

"Just don't get caught, Harry, promise?" Hermione held out her hand.

"Promise," Harry said, shaking her hand, and they walked back to the Gryffindor common room quite happy.


End file.
